The lessor of two evils

The concept of the lesser of two evils fascinates.

Even lukewarm supporters of the TV forensic show CSI were drawn to the double episode directed by Quentin Tarantino who also wrote the story line.

In the yarn, a CSI officer is buried alive in a glass coffin, but left with a gun to shoot himself: ah, the lesser of two evils.

I recall an old joke which lacks a little in logic, as they sometimes do, when they are transferred orally and not subject to the scrutiny available to the written word.

I will try to repair the logic of the joke which is rather juvenile and not that funny, but suits our purposes, here.

Oh alright, I'll just tell the joke; no one likes a preamble anymore.

A man catches his wife having adultery and the outraged husband grabs her naked male lover down to a shed and puts his penis in a vice. The husband turns on a welder and naked man screeches: ``you are not going to burn me with that thing?'' No, the husband replies and he uses the welder to burn the handle off the vice.

To the relief of the naked man, the husband leaves but he returns with a huge kitchen knife and places it beside the penis of the naked man who screams: ``You are not going to cut it off, are you?'' The husband replies: ``No, you are; I'm going to burn down the shed.''

The lesser of two evils, you see, as well as men's fear of castration. How could a joke like that fail, even when it's juvenile and not too funny?

Let's switch to real life. I wouldn't be the only one this happened to.

You have a landlord who is buddy-buddies with you and says you can lease the comfortable abode he owns for as long as you like. He is not going to sell.

Lease renewal time is nearing and your buddy tells you he has an offer too good to refuse on the place and you will have to go. But this bloke is your eternal buddy and he will make it up to you by giving you the choice of leasing one of two other properties he owns.

Only, neither one is near as good as the one you are about to be kicked out of.

But you know you have to take one of them as you need a roof over your head. In making the choice, you, silently but mightily, curse your landlord who is the lessor of two evils.

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Bernie